Action Comics #15: Ummm... GMoz's Action run is all a
5-D illusion? Who else went back and checked the number of worlds
before and after the cataclysm to see if there were 52 left? He's slap
bang on form here (and even the backup is great) but, as I've said
before, this has so little to do with the Johnsiverse I have absolutely
no idea why DC are persisting with the idea it's one of the New 52 (see
also Batman Inc). Last issue's story took place about a decaxe in the
future, and this issue takes place simultaneously in the past, the
present and the future. I think the trade of this is going to be a great
read, and I look forward to re-reading once done, but to be honest as a
monthly floppy I'm finding it kind of infuriating as it feels like you
need to be checking other issues all the time or at least not be
distracted by reading other things. On that basis, I still have mixed
feelings about the book and it doesn't liven up my week's reading.
Animal Man #15:
Featuring Frankenstein, which means you'll need to have read
Frankenstein #15 to know how that turns out before he gets here. Except
it's not published yet. TOP PLANNING. So, they beat all the gorillas in a
couple of pages and walk over America some more. The flashback to the
'present' pans out exactly as you thought it would, and in the future
Buddy has a nightmare about the past, from before they all got in the
camper van. Having finally got to Metropolis, where the secret prison of
the guy that can beat Rotworld is, amid much speculation they're going
to find Superman they find Green Lantern. Although not a Lantern we've
seen before, and obviously they haven't been reading Earth 2 because in
there Alan Scott beats Grundy when he turns up as the Earth 2 King of
Rot. Rot is kind of how I feel about this book now, if I'm honest. It's
clearly not a real future, and is so obviously full of padding it's not
that engaging. Swamp Thing is clearly driving this narrative, and
actually being good is obviously in its favour. But more on that later.
As for this, it's 2 pages of resolution of the last plot then 18 pages
of nothing then 2 pages of cliffhanger. Just like the last half dozen
issues. Disappointing.
Batwing #15: Western
science beats African magic. GOT THAT? A massive electric Bat-net stops
the baddie from mind-controlling people and Batwang decides not to throw
him off a roof, just to show what a good man he is. Pity he's still a
cop accepting bribes, eh?
Detective Comics #15:
There's a great story in here about the resolution to the Clayface and
Ivy marriage story but it's kind of overshadowed by the Penguin plot in
which we get another blonde smoking slightly shifty anti-hero to go with
the ones in Justice League Dark and Wonder Woman. Is it any wonder then
this feels like it's going over old ground? Especially when it's a core
Bat-book during a massive Bat-crossover that it doesn't go near except
referring to it in one panel? The backup is really kind of excellent
though, with the full story of Clayface and Ivy told with pace and
poise. You know what it reminds me of? Concrete. And you can't say that
about many books DC are publishing these days.
Dial H #7:
Nelson and Roxie continue to look for another dial, slowly picking up
clues (mainly in France). The great thing about this is the balancing of
comedy and moving the plot forward, even if it's just goofing off with
barking mad and useless characters. At the end, Mieville show's he's
read The Invisibles and the bad guy is revealed as GMoz's time centipede
thing. A trick is missed by not calling him the Human Centipede, I
fear.
Earth 2 #7: Alan Scott gets used to the
idea of being Green Lantern and Hawkgirl tries to intimidate him into
embracing his Lantern-ness. There's an underground base and then
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO who wanted Mister Terrific back in this? We'd only
just managed to forget about him! But then... yay yay yay we might be
getting Red Tornado soon! Although I don't know why I'm looking forward
to it, they'll probably bollocks it up as badly as Blue Devil. It's come
to this, that the base expectation for any DC book now is that it'll be
crap and if it isn't then we all applaud. That can't be right, can it?
GI Combat #7:
How can a comic featuring a giant Nazi war wheel driven by the corpse
of Erwin Rommel and destroyed by a ghost, a magic tank and a guy in his
80s be bad? That's right, IT CAN'T. The Unknown Soldier backup is solid
enough and closes the story out, but the ending is a bit corny. You know
what though? I can't help thinking if the book had started with Haunted
Tank rather than giving JT Krul YET ANOTHER chance then it might have
built up a slight head of sales and wouldn't be getting cancelled. Maybe
a lesson to be learned there, but Johns and DiDio aren't in the game of
learning.
Green Arrow #15: Oh God, this is
dreadful rubbish. The not-concluded Hawkman stuff from last issue (which
appears to have been concluded off-page) has left Oliie with a head
injury which may or may not mean this whole issue is being imagined.
Anyway, he breaks up a dog fight where the dog (the special favourite of
on of the main bad guys) fights the other main bad guy for a diamond
ice pick. "Made of real ice - geddit?" says the main bad guy. No, we
don't. This needs putting out of its misery.
Stormwatch #15:
Is this actually worse? I think it might be. There's a quadruple bluff
and the guy from the first couple of issues (who we might have all
forgotten about) turns out to be the bad guy behind everything and not
shy of killing a roomful of kids to frame Midnighter. There's implanted
memories (which in a twist I'm sure Pete Milligan assumes is SHOCKING)
which may actually be inverted and the Midnighter might be the only one
with the implanted memory, which is that everybody else has implanted
memories saying he's bad... and emo Apollo flies into the sun to mope.
Presumably his bedroom wasn't far enough away. Confusing rubbish,
bordering on unreadable.
Swamp Thing #15:
Compared to Animal Man, as you really have to do since they have the
same plot, this is a work of genius. On its own merit, it's a pretty
competent comic telling of the journey of Swampy and Deadman to Gotham
looking for Batman, and finding Batgirl, interspersed with the 'now' of
Abby trying to escape from the castle as Rotworld starts. It's just so
much of a shame that this whole tie-in exists and that it's supposed to
be part of the Johnsiverse - it would probably make a great standalone
GN, but DC know better. Of course they do.
Phantom Stranger #3:
They know well enough to produce this execrable crap. Written by their
head guy. Words really can't describe how awful this is, honestly. It's a
number of action poses, linked by some dreadfully stilted dialogue
including a section where a character looks like he's going to discover
God but goes to Thailand instead. There's a talking dog and the POWER OF
PILATES. And wow, another slightly magic, wisecracking, sinister
sidekick who smokes. That's 4 now. Who ever said DC had run out of
ideads?
World's Finest #7: Damian shows up to help and it turns out Darkseid is KONY 2012. Really? REALLY? Ugh.
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