Batgirl #15: I know the Bat franchise is all about
vengeance, but jeez, Gail Simone ladles it on. Batgirl wants to kill the
Joker because he's hurting her mum. No, because of the whole cripple
thing. No, her mum. No, the cripple thing. No, because of James. No,
because of her mum. How do you live your life as such a seething ball of
hate? It's amazing she's able to function, she's so led by her
emotions. Anyway, (one of) the Joker's plans is revealed and... it's the
plot to Boxing Helena. Which might almost be ironic and/or cute if one
of the characters was called Helena, but since there isn't just feels
lazy. I'd like to hope it was this "shocking revelation" that got Gail
sacked.
Batman #15: Bruce, your skills of denial
are fearsome but you're wrong. Of course the Joker's been in the Batcave
and of course he knows who everybody is. Even Jason Todd, WHO HE
KILLED, knows this is true and him zinging you over it is the highlight
of this otherwise overly wordy issue. Not Jurgens Superman wordy, I'll
give you, but very full of exposition and explanation. Maybe if a plot's
that complex then it's too complicated? Maybe? The backup is far more
like it, giving us the Joker's escape from Arkham and bring the
(presumbly unreformed in the Johnsiverse) Riddler along for the ride.
Poor old Steve though. Being ruined too like that.
Batman & Robim #15:
See Gail? Peter Tomasi gets it. Actually, he possibly has more fun with
the Joker than any of the other current Bat-writers, having him play
with his face and sticking his hands through the mouth - even wearing it
upside-down in a pretty disturbing image. I can't help thinking the
whole Alfred plot is nothing more than sleight of hand during this
crossover, and I stand by my guess that Damian is the one who dies after
reading this issue.
Deathstroke #15: Not improved by lack of Liefeld. Now that's a claim.
Demon Knights #15:
Some day a real rain will come and wash the magic off the bad guys. Not
really how I thought this plot would end, but you can't have
everything. It ends with the formalisation of the group as Stormwatch,
and we all know if Merlin calls you a name you decide to keep it. This
book has, unfortunately, petered out month on month after about the
first 9 months and is probably nearing the end of worth. The next issue
is set "thirty years later" though, so maybe a new team (presumably?)
will revitalise it. Sales figures would suggest it's a lost cause
though.
Frankenstein #15: So, now we know the
missing link between Frankenstein #14 and Animal Man #15, which is that
the magic women who turned up on the final page of last issue all die 2
pages into this issue in order for Frankie to beat the big monster. The
rest of the issue is emo nonsense as it turns out F is head over heels
with Not Abe Sapien and has made her pregnant. When did she stop wearing
her water helmet? I've only just realised she doesn't have it on during
this issue. Limping over the line rather than finishing strongly, the
scent of failure is all over this title now and it's a chore to finish.
Green Lantern Corps #15:
Guy isn't a Lantern any more. John Stewart is with one of the Star
Sapphires, who tethers her heart with love to the bit of Mogo that JS
has found to help it meet all the other bits of Mogo. Salaak is now the
best Lantern in the history of Lanterning ever, as he's just about able
to work out what the Guardians are doing (which seems to be proving
ridiculously easy, so maybe the Lanterns aren't all that after all). Guy
decides he going to bluff it against bad guys and goes out to bust some
heads, but only ends up ruining a lengthy police honey trap for an arms
dealer. Which, it seems, gets you arrested. There had to be something
arresting about this book, I guess. Badum-tish.
Grifter #15:
Wow. Marat Michaels goes all-out with his Liefeld worship here. It's
much cleaner inked than Rob, but the poses and layouts are just as bad -
arguably worse. King Shark, for example, is a noticeably different size
in all four panels he's in. There's a plot in here somewhere but it's
buried so far below the overwhelming tide of crap that I can't be arsed
expending the effort to find it. Something to do with Mormon Daemonites I
think. C'mon. I couldn't be making that up, could I? Anyway, this takes
place about 6 months ago in continuity, I think, based on the Suicide
Squad represented here. Is it so difficult to get basic things right,
like WHO'S ALIVE?
Legion Lost #15: Wildfire
sacrifices himself to no avail, although apparently they're going to try
and rebuild him. I thought this was the last issue, but it turns out
the next one is. Or not, as apparently it's merging (of sorts) with the
Ravagers. You have to query the editorial mentality at DC, really. EVERY
cancelled book - which has been cancelled because of poor sales,
remember - has been merged or continued in another title. Here's the
thing: people weren't buying it because they didn't like it. They still
won't like it if/when you change the name and continue it in secret. Or
am I missing something?
Suicide Squad #15: I
think this will actually turn out to be a key point in Death of the
Family in the end, as we find out a lot about the Joker's general
motivation in the Johnsiverse. But that last page. I look forward to how
THAT'S explained.
Superboy #15: Oh God, I had
forgotten this crossover was still going. Superboy is beaten almost to
death, so Supes flies him off to the Fortress of Solitude and tries to
put his armour on Superboy to cure him. His logic is that it will
recognise Kryptonian bloodline and help him but it doesn't work
properly. Supes rationalises this as proof Superboy is a clone of him.
Yes. The thing that works by recognising Kryptonians (in his head)
doesn't work because he's perfectly identical to Kryptonians. Still, how
can you take a man seriously who stops between two panels to put on a
cape for no obvious reason? He'l looks like he's winning, which clearly
means he'll lose in the next issue of Supergirl.
Team 7 #3:
The hiding place of cancelled characters does a fairly basic spy team
book as they try and break up whatever it is the singer from Ghost is
trying to do. None of it really matters as the point of the whole thing
is Deathstroke being turned into Eclipso on the last page. I doubt it'll
make this readable next month, but you never know.
Ravagers #7:
Fairchild sees a future where the Ravagers destroy the world. Yes, it's
them that do it, not the definitely true Rotworld, or the Guardians'
Third Army, or the New Krypton, or anything else that is definitely the
future which will destroy everything. If you're having continuity, you
sort of have to stick with it. (By the same token, where is this in
relation to Legion Lost?) Deathstroke's going to be in the next one.
Because he improves everything, obviously.
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